Getting Caught Up in Potential
Discerning Between Self-Sabotage and Growth Opportunities
I went to college from 1996 until 2001.
I walked in graduation but my ambition and procrastination got the best of me. I took off for Miami during my last semester of college and while I was still enrolled and getting credit with my job, I was missing one critical class for my major.
Technically, a BA is considered 120 credits which I had easily exceeded that threshold. However, the one class I was missing was for my major and because it was a required class, I left 5 years of college without a diploma to show for it.
I had all the intentions to close this loop but as I progressed in my career, the need for the paper was non-existent. I was told that I had what was considered a BA equivalent, which sounded legit at the time but in hindsight was a bullshit excuse that hung over me for 22 years.
Once I pursued self-employment in a completely different field, the need for credentials became less relevant. I figured since I abandoned my career in social services, a degree in sociology was not going to support my rise in the creative entrepreneurial space.
22 years of succeeding despite the blemish…until now.
I returned to a career path in social services, specifically within the education sector, which is kinda diligent about those academic credentials that I had neglected for the last two decades.
Whether you call it karma or coming full circle, if I was going to evolve my trajectory with empowering young adults in workforce development, I needed to tie up those loose ends.
I now officially have my BA in sociology even though nothing has changed about my expertise. I didn’t magically become smarter or more capable with a diploma. The last 20 years of lived experience afforded me insights into cultivating a talent and skillset that was always my destiny. And while the diploma helps others validate my worth, I don’t consider my potential any more potent because of that paper.
So where do I go from here?
In many ways, I invalidated my potential because of this unfinished business. It wasn’t like I was missing a class. I was missing one final paper which affected my grade in one simple class. Neglecting on that created this aura of imposter syndrome rooted in reality and masking my potential.
As I reflect on my current full-time job and explore future prospects, I have a newfound confidence regarding the compensation I feel justly entitled to as someone who has more than paid their dues and NOW has the credentials to show for it.
So…when does confidence become arrogance? When does self-advocacy become bravado?
At my age, there is no reason why I am not earning in the six figures and it wasn’t until I saw my name on a piece of paper with the official state seal to fully embody that belief.
This is not my first rodeo. I excel at anything I do.
These are not proclamations of ego. They are affirmations from standing in my truth.
This next chapter is about how I bridge the gap between the contributions I make and the compensation for my expertise. I am not just trying to prove my worth within entrepreneurship.
I am finally ready to articulate and command a presence that I’ve earned.
It only took 22 years.