Younger is Not Better Than Older
Try Not to Settle Just Because It's Easier
I missed the last season of YOUNGER. I’m catching up now. So much of my weekend has been about reflecting if I even want to keep the new job that I am moving into.
Quitting felt good. Choosing to leave a toxic dynamic felt invigorating. Knowing there may be professional casualties as the result of prioritizing my own well-being feels like shit.
I don’t just miss having my own schedule. I miss the professional environment. I miss wearing make up and coordinating outfits with heels. I miss working with people who also prioritize their appearances. I never want to judge casual wear because clothing don’t impact the value of the work we do. I do recognize though that how others show up can either inspire me to show up better or allow me to settle for less.
I don’t want to be YOUNGER. I want to enjoy the chapter that I am currently writing. I wonder how much of this career shift will enable me to fully participate in my life.
Watching this show unlocks a core memory where I was a thriving solopreneur, with an audience and clients that sought me out for my expertise.
I miss being in a bubble of relevance.
One of the toughest pills to swallow is how I’ve become OK with dimming my light.
I tried to bring my confidence to a place where people settle for crumbs. I am trying to find a sweet spot where I don’t surrender my nuanced ambition for a life where I’m ok with settling.
Here’s to hoping that I made the right decision. Here’s to wishing that I don’t settle for less than what I know I’m capable of.
This is the first time that I want to experience all that comes with being OLDER.